There are actually more than 3 types of thinking
but I would like to look at the 3 types that are
present in our daily lives and effect our well-being :
Encouraging and supportive thinking which uplifts our spirits, self-esteem and mood.
This type of thinking is beneficial when it encourages, motivates and inspires us to be kinder and more caring to ourselves and others.
This type of thinking is detrimental when it elevates us up too high, so that our opinion of ourselves becomes overblown leading to arrogance, self-righteousness and narcissism.
Healthy positive thinking tends to be patient, kind. considerate, compassionate, understanding, forgiving, grateful and respectful.
This type of thinking is the balance between positive and negative thinking.
It is our own opinion about things and it is honest and sincere for that moment.
This type of thinking is benenfical when it motivates us to look honestly and sincerely at ourselves and our experiences.
This type of thinking is deterimental when we use our "honesty" in a passive aggressive manner and use it as an excuse to hurt ourselves or others.
Realistic thinking allows us to be honest with our thoughts and feelings and opinions.
It allows us to learn.
It allows us to be discerning.
It allows us to develop wisdom.
Self-acceptance without egotistical narcissism means you see your strengths, your flaws and your weaknesses. You accept the struggle that is a part of the human condition.
When we can see our flaws, without empowering them and allowing them to run rampant, we can feel peaceful towards them. Perhaps even reduce the potential harm they may cause.
Sometimes negative thinking is the first step toward making a personal change.
It can motivate us toward realistic thinking.
When negative thinking goes too far and gets out of control it can become
abusive and insulting. Making you feel stressed, anxious and low.
If our thinking just insults and harms us it is of no use to us.
Combat negative hurtful thoughts with a combination of self-acceptance (hey i'm only human) and humility (admit when you are wrong).
When managed correctly
8 Tips to help you manage your thoughts.
1. Paying attention to your minds chatter and its effect on you.
Question the way you think and change old bad habits into new beneficial ones that increase your well-being.
We all have flaws so acknowledge and accept this fact about yourself and others.
Balance self-acceptance with humility so you don't act like a jerk.
Sometimes we need to take a good honest look at ourselves and see if we are sabotaging ourselves or hurting others. We should always strive to do the least amount of damage possible. But we are not perfect and often screw up so don't expect perfection. Basically: don't be too hard on yourself, but don't be too easy either.
4. Stop comparing yourself to others.
There is always someone better than you and there is always someone worse.
Comparing just leads to problems.
Be yourself and don't try to be someone else.
5. Have compassion for yourself and others.
Direct compassion towards your own pain. This can be very soothing and healing. When we learn to have compassion for ourselves we can learn to have compassion for others.
6. Let go of wrongs
Eventually there will come a time when we should let go of past wrongs.
Move on from your mistakes and others mistakes too.
Don't allow the memories of the past to keep haunting and hurting you.
Move on and forget about them without bitterness, vengeance or malice.
Of course every situation is unique and different and these are just general ideas.
7. Set boundaries
Don't put too much value in what other peoples opinions are.
Of course don't strip them of all value either.
A lot of our negative thought processes have developed through what we have heard in the outside world. Now we are just repeating those things to ourselves.
Set boundaries and don't allow nastiness to infect your mind.
You need to protect and nurture your mind.
Listen to other peoples opinions and determine for yourself whether they are valid or not.
It's your life you decide.
When necessary, be polite and learn to set boundaries and say no if and when necessary, for your own well-being.
8. Value integrity
Ponder wisdom and spiritual ideas.
Take some time to get to know the qualities that are beneficial to your well-being.
Define for yourself what you believe.
Take time to think, contemplate, read wisdom books, get inspired with positive messages etc...and determine what is important to you.
Sometimes bad things happen because we are foolish or ignorant. Sometimes bad things happen because it is just random chaos. If we strive to do our best, that is good enough.
The wiser we become the better it is for our well-being.